You Can't Go Home Again

The girls had a half-day of school today, and Oma and I thought it would be fun to take them down county.  We drove half an hour South, and ended up in my old hometown.

I was pleased to see that some of the old stores are still there.

And, of course, the real reason for the trip:

The best classic pizza anywhere on the planet.  Anywhere.  I would bet good money that Bobby Flay would not beat the surly guys at Sal's in a pizza smackdown.  

One summer during college, Auntie J got a slice there every single day.  She's the only one that the guys behind the counter didn't growl at, and I think she once even got a half-smile, although I can't prove it.

Then we went to a dollar store that was definitely not here during my childhood.  

Each child was allowed to pick two things.  I was too.  The girls picked out headbands and coloring books and golden hairbrushes.  I immediately went for this:

The translated English was priceless.

1.  Please do not touch it movement.

2.  Please don't clean it case by using paint thinner or other chemical materials.  Neuter soap of cleanser as cleaning liquid is recommendable.

3.  Please change the battey once a year.  Exhausted batter may leak and damage your product.

And on the other side:

New Design!

Funny Jump Rope!

High-Class!

In the end, I thought better of it and went for old-fashioned wooden clothespins and 55 safety pins.

But I thought about that High-Class jumprope all the way home.

Comments

[Natalie]

I can see why you thought of that jump rope all the way home. Especially after visiting you childhood town.

[nkp]

That is just freakin' hilarious, Alexis! Great post.

Now can ya gimme the coordinates for Sal's? Cause great pizza is always on my radar!

[randi]

Love those instructions! Never heard of a battery on a jump rope before. Wonder how that works! :)

[The Coffee Lady]

Oh I SEE! A dollar store is like a pound shop!

[Andrea]

I'd just like to know exactly where the batteries go on a jump rope...and if the batter that leaks out of them is cake batter, because I'd take a ruined jump rope if it produced cake batter.

And I'd like to know exactly how to get to this pizza place on public transportation.

That's all.

[caroline thornewill]

HA! That's awesome.

[Amy]

Ah, but did you visit the Quilt Cottage - just a few doors down from Sals? Nancy is a 7th Avenue type turned local fabric shop owner - she's lovely and has a wonderful selection of fabrics... I drive down there for most of my 'needs'. And Millers - what can I say? If I could only afford to buy my kids toys/clothes/gear there... alas.

I didn't know you grew up there. But there are many many things I don't know about you. I like the mystery but maybe we'll actually spend some face to face time. Please please please make the rain stop. Do I sound like I have cabin fever? I'll stop now.

[jessica]

That translation cracked me up big time!

[Tara Thayer]

Ok, Alexis, where do I start? First, don't make me guess, just tell me where this is please, in an e-mail if you can. I spent months erroneously thinking you & Amy lived in Pleasantville, and it exhausted me. Second...great pictures. Third, VennCircus looks awesome, I'm going to go over there and read when these kids go away (to college? sooner, maybe.) Lastly: sometimes when Tim is bored, he goes on some translation site, types in an english sentence into spanish, and then does it back into english, and laughs for an hour or so about the resulting grammatical chaos. He's really not that big of a geek, but man, when I re-read this, maybe he is.
Have a good night! No more school...woohoo, huh?

[Sarah]

At least you documented that English translation of the jump rope's label and took that photo. Will you submit it to engrishfunny.com? Sounds like a great outing with your children. (So sorry they are moldy. That made me laugh on Twitter.)